Thursday, August 25, 2011

Real To Everyone: Bisexual Study Sponsored by AIB Makes The News

Just this week, the journal of Biological Psychology published a Northwestern University study that contradicted 2005 research questioning whether male bisexuality even existed. It was the second of two such papers that finds that it does.

"Bisexuality is an orientation among men, just like heterosexuality and homosexuality," said Allen Rosenthal, a doctoral student in the university's psychology department and lead author of the study.
Read More At:

Many congrats to AIB, and all the brave folks who were in this study. Many congrats to the all the bi folks who are speaking from their experience with their friends, family and others about this amazing orientation spectrum so many of us call home! We all have lots of different ways of expressing ourselves and our sexuality. While it can be a lil abrasive to be called "real", one is reminded of the Velveteen Rabbit -- what makes us real is our love, and those who love us. Each and every one deserves that kind of reality I think!

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Dan Savage Tells It How It IS

Nicely done, Dan.  

"You should also head to bisexual websites and online forums for insight, advice, and support. A good place to start is There are lots of bi folks out there who've come out to their conservative families, who've overcome their fear of being rejected for being bi, and who know that bisexuality is something that can—if a person is open about it—attract the right kinds of partners, i.e., partners who view bisexuality as a plus. Talking with other bi folks will help." - Read the whole piece at

Kudos to the many Bi and LGBT activists who have been working very hard to educate and enlighten Dan Savage so that he in turn can support the many bi/pan/fluid folk who come to him for advice. 

Friday, August 05, 2011

Host A Scrabble Night and Fund Raise For Your Bi/Pan/Fluid Org!

How We Staged a Successful Game Night/Fundraiser

Objective: We wanted to raise money for the organization and provide a great social event for our

Solution: We decided to stage a “Scrabble Night and Silent Auction” at which we raised $700.

Key Organizational Elements: The following are all things to consider when you decide to stage
something like this:
  • We were able to have the event in GLBT friendly church basement (one of our members is a member of the church), so they didn’t charge us anything.
  • We bought some soft drinks in bulk, but had Board members bring pot luck type items – things like chili, chips, baked goods, etc were the norm. We didn’t try to provide an actual meal, just some snacks.
  • We advertised on our website, listserv, and Facebook. Definitely encouraged people to bring a friend or ally.
  • Two people we specifically in charge of going to local businesses and asking for donations to the silent auction. Note: it generally does not work for people to donate their own personal possession, unless it is of obvious value. Donating to a silent auction is not the opportunity to clean out your basement. Having said that, others on the Board and in the organization were encouraged to go to business they patronize and ask for donations.
  • We focused on Scrabble and had a mini-tournament, but we brought other board and card games. To be honest, the tournament aspect of the evening faded away and people just enjoyed playing. I would recommend that you just have games and table set up and let people get together and play. If you do a tournament you have to have time limits, keep scores, etc. The 2 or 3 ace, Type A players will be disappointed, but everyone else will enjoy it more.
  • At the entry point, have a table set up where you “check in” folks. Checking in entails getting their email address if they want to join the listserv, giving them a name tag and asking them to contribute the “suggested giving” amount (we went with $10).
  • We made periodic announcements about bidding on the silent auction items.
  • Areas to assign someone to be responsible for the event: Publicity, Silent Auction, games, food, set up and clean up.
Thanks to Jim Larsen and the Bisexual Organizing Project for providing details on a great and FUN fundrasing tool!  Just in time for Celebrate Bisexuality Day planning!

A Guide to Bisexual/Pansexual/Fluid Etiquette

 Creating Change 2012 is coming up!  If you're interested in attending visit the Facebook page to meet other bi/pan/fluid folk excited to make change!  

The guide to bi/pan/fluid etiquette developed for last year's Creating Change conference was a major hit so check it out below and share with a friend!

A Guide to Bisexual/Pansexual/Fluid Etiquette

The bisexual identity speaks more to the existence of attraction to people of any gender, rather than merely a statement of past or current relationships and/or sexual activities. Bisexual, pansexual, fluid and folks who choose to remain “unlabeled” are part of the LGBT community and need you as an ally just as much as they remain your strong partner in the fight for equality. To that end, we offer a few notes on bisexual/pansexual/fluid communities.

Common misconceptions about bisexual/pansexual/fluid communities include: There’s no such thing as bisexuality; bisexuality is just a phase; bisexual people have multiple partners and/or can’t have monogamous relationships; bisexuality itself reinforces the gender binary; bisexual people spread sexually transmitted diseases; and bisexual people face less discrimination than gay, lesbian and transgender people. 

We have all had moments in our lives where we have been misperceived and misunderstood, we hope everyone will draw from their own experiences to create a space in which we can all be our full selves during the conference.

Each individual may have a different definition of bisexuality.  Contrary to common misconceptions, bisexuality is not exclusively a transitional phase between heterosexuality and homosexuality. No single pattern exists among bisexuals. Many people declare their bisexuality to claim their personal history. They don’t want to erase previous loves or parts of themselves to buy acceptance.  Because one’s definition does not fit another does not make it any less valid. Please respect each person’s power and ability to define themselves. 

A few other ways to embrace the bisexual/pansexual/fluid communities:
·         Use inclusive language, instead of “gay rights” or “gay marriage” try “equal rights” and “marriage equality”.
·         Question the negativity associated with bisexual stereotypes.
·         Check in with someone about what term(s) they prefer – Remember that no one person represents a community; no two people are the same and definitions may vary.
·         Recognize that bisexuality is often invisibilized/ delegitimized, so bi/pan/fluid people usually have to come out over and over.
·         Respect people’s privacy and boundaries. Take a moment before asking questions and look into the assumptions behind them.
·         Recognize that bisexual people often face similar discrimination and obstacles as gays and lesbians with regard to job security, healthcare, marriage, custody, visitation and adoption of children.
·         Recognize the way that specific relationships function is entirely independent of sexual orientation. Be positive about all relationships –monogamous, polyamorous, or anything else.
·         Accept you might never fully understand someone else’s sexuality, and that it’s okay not to.

Thank you for respecting all the ways we can love each other!  Enjoy the conference!

Compiled by 2011 Creating Change Bisexual/Pansexual/Fluid Organizing Institute Co-coordinators, Becky Saltzman and Faith Cheltenham.   

- The National Conference on LGBT Equality, Creating Change 2011 Conference Program